Family

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“My Beloved”

Published June 13, 2012 by The Creative Outpost

I was 21-years-old and finishing up college when I became pregnant. I wasn’t prepared to have a child and neither was the baby’s father. It was the hardest decision I ever made, but I decided to give the baby up for adoption. When it was time to deliver, I braced myself for the heartbreak of saying goodbye to my baby girl. I had purchased a heart-shaped locket to give to her, so someday she would hopefully know that I did love her, when I made that difficult decision. I decided to leave the information regarding her adoption open to her new parents, so if she ever decided to find me it would be possible.

The day I delivered her was the happiest and saddest day of my life. She was so beautiful. She had a full head of dark black hair and a heart-shaped face. I had spent a lot of time selecting parents for my biological daughter. They were both educated, successful and more importantly kind and ready to be parents. I handed over my baby girl and gave them the heart-shaped locket with the inscription that I had put so much thought into that read, “My Beloved”.

Five years later, I had a successful career and was happily married. I had never forgotten my baby girl but trusted that I had made the right decision. Even with my current success and stability, I still believed I had made the right decision. I often wondered if the parents would contact me someday. My husband and I discovered that we could not conceive a child. After much thought it occurred to me that this was also an opportunity for an unprepared mother, a child that needed a loving home and for a mother that wanted a child.

We contacted an adoption agency and went through the lengthy process. There were several times we were expecting to bring a baby home but things always fell through. Our adoption agent called one day with an unexpected suggestion. She had a five-year-old girl who had lost both of her parents and needed a home. She knew that we wanted a baby, but wanted us to consider adopting an older child. It didn’t take long for me to realize that this was the blessing we had been waiting for!

We got together with the agent and finalized everything. It was a difficult story she shared with us. The little girl’s family had adopted her when she was a baby and had been killed in an accident leaving behind their daughter with no one to care for her.

The day had arrived. We waited anxiously and excitedly for the little girl’s arrival. It was time, the doorbell chimed and we went to meet our daughter. She was beautiful. Long black hair with a heart-shaped face. It was as if God had sent this beautiful child to me to fill the hole in my heart. That’s when I saw a shimmer peeking out from around her neck. What could the odds be of this little girl wearing a heart-shaped locket? I asked her timidly if I could look at the beautiful necklace. Her little face lit up with this request and with hands shaking I reached forward and opened the tiny locket. There inside was the inscription I had so thoughtfully written five years earlier, “My Beloved.”

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